


How I Imagined Our Reunion

by Faihu



Series: Season 5 One-Shots [4]
Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Angst, Extended Scene, F/M, Lucifer (TV) Season/Series 05 Part 1, Season/Series 05
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-19
Updated: 2020-09-19
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:47:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26546992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Faihu/pseuds/Faihu
Summary: When Lucifer tells Chloe that he spent thousands of years in Hell imagining their reunion, she doesn't end the conversation. Instead, she asks Lucifer how he did imagine their reunion.Extended version of Chloe's apartment scene in Episode 5x03.
Relationships: Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar
Series: Season 5 One-Shots [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1920481
Comments: 10
Kudos: 116





	How I Imagined Our Reunion

**Author's Note:**

> I got the idea for this fic when I watched the scene and Lucifer talked about imagining their reunion so I decided to expand the scene a little bit and have them talk about a few more things.

"I spent thousands of years in Hell, imagining our reunion. Getting my partner back, getting… getting you back. And now… I… I just thought it would go differently."

Lucifer was desperate. He came back from Hell just to find that his life on Earth was turned into a total mess, created by his twin brother Michael. And the worst part was that his brother managed to drive a wedge between him and the Detective.

"Yeah. Me too." The Detective turned around and looked at Lucifer. "How did you imagine our reunion?"

The question came as a surprise to Lucifer. The Detective was so angry that she had turned away from him before. He thought she was done talking to him, that she didn't even want to see him anymore. He certainly didn't expect her to turn back and ask about something like this.

Lucifer had thought about their reunion a lot. How they would meet again, what he would say, what _she_ would say, how things would develop after reuniting. Spending what felt like an eternity in Hell, he had a lot of time to think about it after all.

But he never thought someone would actually ask him about it. Talking about it—which was essentially talking about his wishes and feelings for the Detective—was something that wasn't easy for him. He was still not used to all the feelings he felt when he was with her. And even more, he was still not used to the fact that someone actually had real feelings for _him_. At times he found it downright scary how all of it made him feel.

This was a chance though. The discussion wasn't completely done yet, she was open to hearing more. He _had_ to say more and tell her how much she really meant to him.

"First of all, I found a way to leave Hell without creating problems for you or anyone else if I leave the place unattended." Lucifer tried to choose his words carefully. "So I could actually stay with you this time." 

The Detective nodded slightly but didn't respond. 

"And of course Michael didn't come and make a mess out of everyone's lives," Lucifer continued. "That was something I didn't expect at all." 

More nodding from the Detective. 

Lucifer swallowed. Now the hard part was coming. 

"So I can finally leave Hell and come back to Earth… And I come back here, to your apartment because you're the first person I talk to after my return. Actually, I imagined different places where I would meet you the first time but my preference was to meet you alone when no one can disturb us. So we have some time for us."

The Detective still didn't respond but she was at least still looking at him, with eyes that seemed somewhat hopeful. Eyes that made Lucifer think that it was not too late yet, that they could still overcome their problems. 

"Then when I see you I ask you how you are and you say you missed me," he continued. "I take you in my arms and tell you that I missed you too and that I can stay now. And we're both happy about it." 

_And then you kiss me. And I kiss you. And we just know that we belong together._ Lucifer couldn't say out loud what he was thinking, how he wanted it to be. After their fight it didn't seem appropriate to tell her something like that. And using the word "belong" was probably beyond inappropriate now that she was thinking she was just a gift for him. 

"And then I hold you in my arms for the rest of the day," he said instead. "And there is no annoying Michael who runs around trying to ruin everything. It's just you and me finally together. And then we start enjoying our lives… together." 

"Sounds very similar to what I hoped for." It was the first time the Detective responded to Lucifer's words. "I kept going to the penthouse, waiting for you to come back. I always hoped that one day you'd come back to the balcony where you left me. But this time you'd come and say that you'd stay." 

"I also thought about how it would be if we met at the penthouse," Lucifer said. "Picking it up where we left off and turning the sad memories into happy ones." 

Lucifer smiled briefly when he thought about how he would make things better, then he turned serious again. 

"I'm so sorry about how I left you there on the balcony when I went to Hell… I felt terrible about it after I was gone. But I was so scared that something bad would happen if I stay longer, even if it's just for a bit. Because a second here on Earth is going by so much slower in Hell, so the demons could have had enough time to plan something else already."

"I didn't know that time goes by much slower there," the Detective said. "So you really spent thousands of years in Hell after leaving?" 

"I lost count but yes, it was a few thousand."

"And you still… want to be with me? After such a long time?" 

Lucifer looked at her with a warm smile. "Yes, Detective. Thinking of you was the one thing that kept me sane during all the time down there. Thinking of seeing you again and staying with you. And thinking about how we'd go on another date and this time it wouldn't go wrong. We would just enjoy our time and be happy to be together." 

"Too many things are going wrong all the time, right?" she said in a quiet voice that sounded sad. 

"Indeed," Lucifer replied, trying not to think about the many bad things that happened. "But I thought when I come back we can fix everything. Because after everything that happened we both know that we want to be with each other… Well, at least we thought so until Michael told you about the gift thing." 

"Yeah… I thought what we had was real. But now I don't know anymore." She didn't look him in the eyes when she said it. 

The words hurt. Lucifer thought she was opening up a bit but now he wasn't sure about that anymore. 

"Did you plan on ever telling me about this?" she asked. 

Lucifer couldn't reply immediately. The whole thing was so complicated that he couldn't even imagine how to bring it up in a conversation. And he remembered how badly he took it when he first heard about it. Of course he had always been scared that she would also take it badly. 

"I wasn't sure how to talk about it… and how you'd react," he replied with some hesitation. 

"So you would just keep something so important to yourself because of that?" 

Of course he knew that it was wrong not to tell her. But how was he supposed to do it? And when? Things were already complicated enough between them. 

Chloe shook her head. "You often keep important things to yourself. And then you expect me to just accept them when they're dropped on me?" 

"No… I know that some things are not so easy to process. But…" 

"But?" 

_But I don't have time to wait. I need to go back but I don't want to without making this right._

He couldn't say it. Lucifer knew that it was not right to pressure her. It was his fault that they were in this situation now. He couldn't blame her for the way she reacted about finding out the truth and making her just accept it. 

"Please tell me, Detective," Lucifer said, "what can I do to make things better?" 

"I don't know," she replied. "I really don't know." 

She was shutting off more and more. And the more she put walls between them, the harder it became for Lucifer to suppress the feeling of anxiety. The fear of losing her forever became too real. 

"I really wanted to come back and continue being at your side as your partner," he said slowly. "Helping you, solving crimes together as a team. And be with you as more than just your work partner and friend. I… I really missed you."

"Yeah, well, I wanted that too… Until now when I found out that I was apparently made to want this." 

_Until now._ She didn't want it anymore. Because she thought she was manipulated into wanting it. A feeling Lucifer could relate to just too well. 

"I know how you feel, Detective. I've been manipulated my whole life. And I've rebelled against my father's manipulations many times. But—" He stopped for a moment to think about his next words. "But I've also seen good things come out of it. I believe that not everything about it is bad. And I hope you can see this too." 

"I'm sorry, Lucifer, but I don't see anything at the moment. And I think I want to be alone now." 

_No. Please no._

Lucifer kept standing where he was, unable to move. He stared at her, hoping she would change her mind. But nothing happened. He had his chance to turn things around and for some reason he ruined it again. Michael. He shouldn't have mentioned Michael. Maybe he should have focused more on the positive things. More about how imagined them being together.

But then he realized that this was exactly just this—his imagination. His wishes, his _desire_ to be with the Detective, it was just what he wanted and it didn't mean that she would automatically want it in return. Not after learning the truth of how she came into this world.

"Please, Lucifer."

The way she looked at him made it impossible for him to object. She was already hurt enough and nothing he could say or do at the moment would make things better. Even though the only thing he wanted right now was to hold her and tell her that everything would be fine. 

"Can I…" He stopped speaking when he realized that he started to speak his thoughts out loud.

"What?" she asked.

He should probably pretend that it was nothing. Everything he could say or do now only seemed to make things worse. But maybe it was already bad enough. Maybe he should just be honest. One last try.

"Can I… just hold you for a second?"

Lucifer regretted his words right after speaking them out loud. It was a completely unreasonable request in the current situation. She had just told him that she wasn't sure about them anymore and that she wanted to be alone. Lucifer tried to prepare himself mentally for the rejection that he was sure would come. 

"Okay," she whispered. 

_She didn't say no._

That was an unexpected answer but Lucifer tried not to let it show how much it surprised him. Whatever it was that made her agree to it, Lucifer was thankful for it. He approached her slowly, hesitating when he was standing right in front of her. She looked at him with such sad eyes that it hurt him deep inside. But at the same time her eyes seemed to say that she didn't hate him. 

He gently wrapped her arms around her and held her close to him. Her warmth was calming him down and made his anxiety go back a bit. She was still there. She didn't reject him completely. There was still hope. 

Lucifer didn't know how long they were standing like this. He didn't want to know and more importantly, he didn't want it to end. The closeness, the warmth, the familiar scent that made him feel like he was home—he didn't want to give it up anymore. 

"You should really go now," she mumbled into his chest. 

_No. I don't want to._

He pressed her even closer to him. 

"Please." Her voice was so quiet he could almost not hear it. 

Lucifer slowly let go of her. It was clear that she still didn't want him to stay. And he definitely didn't want to force her to do anything she didn't want to. 

He nodded, unable to say anything.

She looked at him, not saying anything either. 

Disappointed about the fact that this seemed to be the end of their conversation, Lucifer turned around and walked to the door. When he opened the door he turned his head back to her. For a moment he hoped that she would change her mind and ask him to stay. But she didn't. 

"See you, Detective." 

"M-hm," she replied.

Then he left the apartment. 

Once he was alone outside on the street, the negative feelings hit him even more than before. He felt exhausted, empty, alone—and so helpless. This was not how he hoped their conversation would go. 

But then he remembered holding her in his arms before leaving and the hope she gave him with this. This couldn't be the last goodbye. Lucifer was ready to do anything to keep what he had. 

He just needed to show her that she wasn't "just a gift". That she was so much more to him. And that his father placing her into this world didn't change anything about it. 

When he arrived at his car he already felt a bit better. The situation was bad but not completely lost. And he was determined to turn it around and make things better. 


End file.
